[00:00:00] Have you ever caught yourself spiraling after your adult child didn't respond to your message? Or maybe your thoughts start racing to, they must hate me, I'm a terrible mom, or I've ruined everything. one moment of silence or an unanswered text can suddenly feel like your whole.

Identity as a mom is ruined.. And I wanna tell you something that might change the way you see all of this, because feelings are not facts. when you start separating your emotions from the truth, that is when you can begin to reclaim your peace. So today I have four tips for you in regards to this because you have to remember that feelings are not facts.

So let's dive in.

Number one, emotions are messengers, right? They're just messengers. They always say, don't shoot the messenger. God designed our emotions to signal something for us not to [00:01:00] define who we are. emotions like guilt or sadness or fear, show up to tell us something.

Like, Hey, this needs your attention, But they're not always rooted in reality. just because you feel like a bad mom doesn't mean you are one. And just because you feel unloved. Doesn't mean you're unlovable. the problem is when emotions are so loud, it's easy to let them kind of take over and let them narrate this story that isn't necessarily true and in estrangement, as you know, those stories can get really dark quickly, and your child's silence does not mean you're forgotten.

And their anger towards you right now doesn't erase all the years that you did show up. So even though these emotions are screaming at you, you have to remember truth speaks softly and that's the one we need to lean into. Number two is emotional reasoning. sometimes we can't really reason with our [00:02:00] emotions because they keep you stuck in pain.

this is when we treat our feelings like facts. so I feel guilty, so I must have ruined their life or something bad must be happening because I feel anxious right now. And it's really sneaky, 'cause it can go unchecked. So if you're feeling something deeply and your brain scrambles to match it with a story that explains the pain, even if that story is not true, I always tell people, stop catastrophizing.

And what proof do you have that this thing you're worrying about is even happening? Has happened, you have no proof. until we have proof, we cannot be stuck in this cycle. this is the cycle of shame. over apologizing for things you didn't do or maybe things that you did do, but where you're accepting blame that is not yours to carry.

you might find yourself bending over backwards hoping that you know your son or daughter's gonna come back around because your emotions you think was all your fault. Due to your emotions, [00:03:00] we cannot be listening to them. I know this sounds familiar for a lot of you. I know it did me, and I know you're probably exhausted from feeling like you're always too much or not enough, or you're needy, or you're this or you're that.

And I want you to know that you do not have to walk this road alone. I help moms just like you, break free from this emotional overwhelm and help you step into peace and truth and healing. I have a discovery call, which is a 30 minute consultation. It is not a coaching call. It's reserved for moms looking to explore a safe place, whether it be one-on-one coaching, group coaching, whatever kind of support might look like for you.

I will be able to talk through all of that with you on our call. if you're interested, you can check the link below wherever you are watching or listening. Number three is I want you to pause, reframe, and question the story. You may have heard that concept before, but you don't have to believe every thought that pops into your head.

we need to create a moment of [00:04:00] pause. Take that breath. Ask yourself, what is true? What am I assuming? What story am I creating in my head right now? For example, maybe you're thinking my child didn't respond. that's a fact, right? They must hate me, is the emotional interpretation of that. I've been there, but I want you to challenge that story.

I want you to reframe it. You know what? My child is silent. My son is silent. My daughter is silent, but that doesn't mean I'm unloved. I don't know what they're going through right now, but my worth does not depend on their communication. You can still honor your emotions and feel it without letting them hijack you.

'cause really is what it feels like. Number four is truth based actions. We don't wanna do emotion based reactions, and I did a video on this not too long ago about reacting versus responding because when our emotions take the wheel. We make decisions that hurt us. We [00:05:00] might send some things that we regret.

you might shut down and isolate. But when you act from a place of truth about your value, your intentions, your faith, then only then can you begin to make some grounded peace filled decisions for you. instead of reacting out of fear or guilt or sadness, I want you to respond from wisdom and strength.

That my friend is emotional resilience. over time, that is what builds this life that will feel more steady, even if your family dynamics have not changed yet. you need that peace that we talked about last time, the peace that surpasses all understanding. 

in the natural world, none of it makes sense, but you can still have peace and strength and wisdom.

I hope this helped you today. I will see you in the next episode. God bless.