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If you’ve ever felt the sting of being left out of your own child’s life, you’re not alone—and you’re not weak for grieving it. In this episode, I share four of the most common emotional triggers moms like us face when navigating estrangement from an adult child. These moments—like holidays, milestones, or even quiet days—can hit unexpectedly and deeply, leaving you feeling invisible in a world that keeps on celebrating.
I talk about how celebrations like birthdays or Christmas, once filled with laughter, can now feel hollow. Milestones such as weddings or the birth of a grandchild may happen without us, sometimes discovered only through a social media post. I share how these moments, especially when viewed from afar online, can quickly unravel any strength you've built. And the hardest of all—the rollercoaster of hope and letdown—can quietly drain your heart if you’re not careful.
Through each trigger, I offer gentle reminders and guidance to protect your peace, honor your grief, and still hold on to hope—but with healthy boundaries. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting or giving up. It means moving forward with grace.
KEYPOINTS FROM THIS EPISODE
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Emotional triggers like holidays, milestones, social media, and hope cycles are common for estranged moms.
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Celebrations can feel like grief, even when you try to hold it together.
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Milestones like weddings or births may bring feelings of exclusion and pain.
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Social media can intensify grief—setting boundaries is essential.
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Hope is beautiful, but without limits, it can deepen disappointment.
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You’re allowed to grieve, protect your peace, and move forward without guilt.
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Your worth was never tied to being included in their life events.
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You’re not giving up—you’re choosing healing.
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There is support available when you're ready to stop going through it alone.
QUOTABLE MOMENTS
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You’re allowed to grieve what used to be—and also create something new.
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Your worth was never tied to being in that front row.
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Social media can be a window into a life you're no longer part of, and it hurts.
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Protecting your peace isn't cutting off love—it's guarding your soul.
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You can still bless them from afar, even if they’ve written you out of their story.
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One photo can ruin your day if you don’t set boundaries around what you see.
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Hope is beautiful, but it needs boundaries too.
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It’s not giving up—it’s moving forward.
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You don’t have to go through this alone. There is healing for you.
TRANSCRIPT OF THIS EPISODE
If you have ever felt the sting of
being left out of your own child's life, I know it hurts more than you thought it
would or ever could. You know, the world keeps celebrating their families and you're
left wondering if anyone even knows what the silence feels like. So if you're a mom facing
estrangement and needing to know how to cope. With each one of these triggers that I'm
gonna share with you to be able to do that without losing yourself in the pain,
then this video is for you. Today I wanna talk about the 4 most common emotional
triggers that you may be experiencing. It might be your child's birthday, a major
holiday. It might just be another quiet day. Number one is holidays and birthdays. You
know those celebrations together and any of them feel like grief. And these
are the days that for you as a mom, they were once filled with joy and traditions
and laughter and now [00:01:00] most likely they bring up sorrow. whether it's
your child's birthday, Mother's Day, your birthday, Christmas, or maybe it's just a
season where your family used to take vacations. You know, it can feel like everyone else
is celebrating while you feel like you're barely holding it together. You might
even be sending a card or longing to, or a message and maybe it was ignored.
Either way, the ache is real and you know what? You're allowed to grieve what used to be,
but you're also allowed to create something new. Just for you a moment to honor the
love that you still carry for them, and also to include in that the hope of what's
to come. Number two is milestones. The moments that you're not part of. whether it be a
graduation, a wedding, a baby announcement, I have a lot of clients right now who are
having to stand on the wayside when their first grandchild is born, [00:02:00] or
their son or daughter is getting married. And these are supposed to be like the
happiest, proudest moments of your life. But estrangement or what has happened in your
family turns these events into wounds for you. Because you know what? You may be finding out
through someone else that this is even happening, or worse yet, social media, finding
out that your child's moving on. It feels like they've kind of written you out of
the story, and so I want you to know that if you choose, you can still bless them from afar if
you truly love them and you're happy for them, even though they're not talking to you. But
you know what? Your worth was never tied to being in that front row, especially at a
wedding that doesn't define your worth. So if this is resonating with you and
you're tired of, pretending you're fine, when really you're grieving, then I invite you
to a discovery call. It's an opportunity. It's a conversation that I have [00:03:00]
with you. It's not a coaching call, rather it's a consultation for when you are ready
to learn about one-on-one or group coaching. Something to move you forward so that you're not
stuck, and if that is you, you can find the link below for the discovery call in the show notes.
Number three is social media. As I mentioned, the pain of watching from a distance, especially
when you're learning some big news. You know, it might just be one photo or one post,
but it's enough to ruin your whole day. And we've talked about this before, but
it really can become a window into a life that you're no longer a part of. And it
hurts, and you may even see smiling faces in all of this. You see your grandkids
possibly, right? We have to protect your peace. We need to log off, hit mute, set
boundaries around what you see unfollow. None of that is going to serve you right now.
So [00:04:00] many of my clients are doing that, and they're just saying no to social media
right now, or at least unfollowing their child, et cetera. Number four is the roller coaster of
hope and let down, you all know what that feels like. It's the ups and downs, and there's
always that small flicker of hope at times. Maybe they'll call, maybe this year will be
different, but when it's not. It cuts even deeper. And this trigger is probably the most,
difficult for moms because you build yourself up hoping for a miracle only to be met with
silence again. But hope can be so beautiful, but it needs some boundaries. You
can't just live in the hope, right? You have to give yourself permission to expect
less, so that your heart doesn't break more, and that it's not giving up. It's really
guarding your soul. It's not giving up at all. It's not moving on, it's moving
forward, which is good. That's what we need. So [00:05:00] these four triggers
are so difficult for moms, the holidays, the birthdays, the milestones, the social
media, the rollercoaster of hope and let down. these moments are so deeply personal for
each and every one of you. they hurt in ways that most people won't understand, But
you don't have to go through them alone. There is healing through this I hope this blessed
you. I'll see you in the next episode. God bless.
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